Taking Care of Business – but Who Takes Care of You?
10 MIN READ
“The enemy of excellence is isolation.”
Aaron Walker
Introduction: Professional isolation in the principalship is a problem for administrators but also for everyone else in their care. In our first blog in this series, we explored the power of delegation, empowering others, recognizing false narratives, and the importance of shared leadership as a strategic antidote to the issue of extreme job dissatisfaction facing educators today. We noted that some strategies, though intuitive, only increase isolation which is the enemy of excellence.
Today, we’ll focus on two of the most powerful professional relationships an administrator can develop to stay sharp, professional mentoring and coaching.
Isn’t the Difference Between a “Coach” and a “Mentor” Just Semantics?
The roles of a mentor and coach are often regarded as being the same thing. But are they?
We’ll start with the role of a professional mentor.
A mentor is typically someone with more experience and expertise who provides guidance, advice, and support to a less experienced colleague. The mentor may provide feedback, share best practices, and help the mentee navigate the challenges of their role. The mentor-mentee relationship is often informal and may be based on a personal connection, shared interest, or role similarity.
For newly hired administrators, identifying your go to “phone a friend” colleague for time sensitive matters is one of the first things you instinctively know to do.
But is your mentor destined to become your professional coach? Not likely.
While both roles involve providing support and guidance, there are some key differences.
A coach is typically someone who provides more structured and focused support with a specific goal or outcome in mind. The coach may help develop specific technical or adaptive skills and provide feedback, encouragement, accountability, and direct support on a set schedule.
Overall, the primary difference between a mentor and a coach in education is the focus and structure of their support. A mentor provides more general guidance and support on a wide range of topics, while a coach provides more structured and targeted support, often with a specific goal or outcome in mind.
What Are the Benefits of Having a Professional Mentor?
Mentors are most often professionals who are not responsible for your growth and are not paid for the time they engage with you. Engage in a mentor-mentee relationship to access the following benefits:
Individualized support and guidance: A mentor can provide personalized support and guidance ranging from day-to-day management tasks to thorny policy issues.
Access to a professional network: A mentor can provide access to an expanded professional network of colleagues, experts, and resources that helps you stay up to date with the latest research, trends, and best practices in the field.
Leadership development: A mentor helps you develop your leadership skills, such as communication, collaboration, problem-solving, and decision-making processes.
Emotional support: A trusted mentor can provide emotional support and encouragement during challenging times or when approaching difficult conversations.
Career advancement: While not your priority, over time, a mentor can provide guidance and support for more formal professional development and career advancement.
Expertise matters. Accessing a mentor will assist you in navigating both the technical and adaptive complexities of your role.
How to Get the Most from a Mentor-Mentee Relationship
Let’s face it, isolation kills and a recent report by the US Surgeon General only confirms what we know intuitively. Administrators experience isolation due to the nature of their work, so it is important to make meaningful connections with colleagues whether informal or formal.
Following these principles will help you to maximize the benefits and results you achieve from having a mentor:
Focus on facts. Stick with what is known to be true, reliable information to avoid false starts or detours.
Always get permission to quote your mentor. It’s a setup for you, your staff, and the professional advising you if you attempt to insert statements from a perceived non-stakeholder. Be selective as to when you might consider quoting the advice provided – and get permission first.
Include culture and climate data. Perceptual data is powerful data that can be quantified. Culture eats strategy for lunch (Peter Drucker) so be sure to use perceptual data when seeking advice from an advisor.
Seek input but own your outcomes. Advice from a trusted advisor can get you going in the right general direction, but ultimately you must own the results you help create.
A mentor who has successfully built a strong culture will be a valuable resource, but they cannot transfer their culture over to your site. Ask a potential mentor to share their data and provide insights on the leadership actions they used to develop such a strong culture.
What a Professional Coach Does
Why does an administrator need a coach? In short, because everyone does!
The Neuroleadership Institute defines coaching as “facilitating positive change by improving thinking.” Your coach, a confidential advocate who strongly believes in you, is indeed passionate about facilitating that positive change in partnership with you! They are on “Team <insert YOUR NAME here>!” The International Coaching Federation (ICF) sums it up well in their definition of coaching. Coaching is “partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential.”
Similar to educators in the classroom responsible for making hundreds of non-trivial decisions each day, school administrators make a staggering amount of substantive decisions per day. They do so between tasks and crises and with limited opportunity to be reflective. In this regard, principals are a bit like basketball players executing in the moment, “play after play after play” with no “subs” or “timeouts” and without the benefit of observation and reflection of a “coach.” Faced with a seemingly endless series of “gametime decisions” to make – and execute – leaders face decision fatigue.
However, coaching sessions create an elusive “time out” (to keep the basketball analogy going) to ensure a dedicated time is set aside to plan for physical, emotional, cognitive, and strategic leadership needs. It also creates a process that is the equivalent of “game film” to support ongoing analysis of outcomes achieved.
Coaches help leaders identify barriers between their current reality and a desired future. Some barriers are evident, but some are not. A great coach, through questioning and listening (lots of listening!), will facilitate the clarification of goals and the navigation of barriers that stand between the current reality and the desired outcome. So, what part of your “leadership game” would you like to improve?
Great Professional Coaching Starts with Great Empathy
If you are apprehensive about seeking out a professional coach, it may be helpful to know that the first step in any quality coaching process starts with empathy. That may sound insignificant, but it’s actually huge! Think of it as drawing up a set of plays that are tailor-made to make the most out of your strengths, your skills, and your passions. That should bring a sigh of relief.
Increased attention to the role of empathy in education has tended to focus on how we best understand and meet the needs of students. That emphasis is not misplaced. However, it is just as important to attend to the needs of the administrative professionals serving the needs of students, staff, and families.
Once a coach has a better sense of you and your current context, they will partner with you to co-design solutions. As a result, you will have a plan, or “playbook” if you will, to execute and then reflect on in your coaching sessions. But don’t get too comfortable just yet. The primary reason to have a coach is to grow. Just as in athletic endeavors, the true test of your progress will be in “game time” performance followed by reflection, practice, and preparation for your next challenge.
Expect to see more on the role of empathy in our final entry in this series!
The Secret Characteristics of All Great Coachees
There is a not-so-well-kept secret of becoming a great leader. The true secret to growth as a leader is… drum roll please… be coachable.
This tops a list of several tried-and-true coaching maxims you will want to embrace to get the most out of having a professional coach.
Be coachable. Always put the emphasis on your own willingness to be coachable. Don’t be surprised if you learn that one of your greatest challenges is simply a reluctance to being coached.
Progress over Perfection (POP). Always try to be a better version of yourself than you were yesterday. Focus on continual improvement for yourself and don’t fall into the trap of comparing yourself to others.
Problems of Practice (the other POP) are a given – your response is variable. Look, without these you wouldn’t have a job description. Remember that the challenges you face have been faced by others before you. Your coach will help you navigate the before-during-after process of tackling challenges.
For those experiencing the isolation that comes with not having a mentor or a coach, there are a few things you can do to prepare for the day when you do.
Tools to Prep for Being Mentored or Coached
There are several things you can do right now – today – to prepare for either, or both, of these important professional resources.
Do you want to see some positive change, but just don’t know where to start? Try this quick and easy self-assessment tool!
Still wondering what exactly coaching is? The best way to understand coaching is to experience it! Click here to do just that... experience it. There is no catch, no gimmick, no commitment.
CEE’s Leadership 360 tool is just one of many that will help you determine where to focus your efforts in connection to how others in your context perceive you.
No time to read? Listen to CEE’s Outliers in Education podcasts to get inspirational and actionable ideas from colleagues that you can apply in your setting.
A lack of formal district support programs and funding challenges may thwart your interest in having a coach. But don’t be dismayed! A possible work-a-round is directing a portion of your annual personal professional development funds toward coaching support. You may also be able to advocate for district use of Title II funds to support your growth as an administrator under ESSA.
Coaches Help Us Get “Unstuck”
One of the hardest things to do in life, and as a leader, is to get “unstuck.” Practices preventing us from being as effective as possible can leave us feeling discouraged.
But what does being “stuck” look like?
Procrastination: Are there uncomfortable tasks or conversations that you are avoiding as a leader? Are you aware of why you’re disengaging from these decisions?
Avoiding Delegation: Is there any chance that you are “doing it all yourself” because that’s the way to get it done right? Are you aware of the impact this may be having?
Perfectionism: Are you putting in excessive hours making things perfect, when “good” would suffice? Are you aware of where your efforts are not getting a solid return vs. time invested?
Downshifting: Is it possible that the swarm of decisions needed each day is depleting your energy to such a degree that you gravitate to easy or trivial decisions in lieu of the “tough stuff”?
The root causes blocking our progress are a double whammy:
(1) lack of self-awareness of these self-imposed barriers coupled with
(2) the absence of someone to facilitate our self-awareness
Lacking insight, or what we can see by looking inwardly, we miss opportunities to grow that are hidden even to us. However, by engaging a coach, these barriers can be surfaced through facilitated reflection and addressed.
When coached, solutions outlined can be implemented and coaching sessions become a vital necessity for growth. Instead of feeling defensive for all that isn’t getting done or going right, you’ll recognize that your coach is facilitating your ongoing self-awareness, action planning, and capacity to articulate your progress.
With your coach as a leadership ally, you are going on the offensive!
Moving at the Speed of Relationships
The need for professional connection is more vital than ever. We hope that you are inspired to engage your opportunities to benefit from having a professional mentor, coach, or both!
Our last blog in this 3-part series will focus on how you can stay on the cutting edge of your profession through innovation.
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